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8 gifts NOT to get dad this fathers day..
1) First let's knock off anything with WORLDS BEST DAD on it. We all know he's not the best dad in the world. If the gift had "the best dad he knows how to be even though that is pretty fucking ordinary" that might be a goer.
2) Undies, really? Would you buy mum a bra? Undies are extremely personal and not something a child should be envisaging as a gift. How do you know what is comfortable for his meat and two veg?
3) SOCKS OR SLIPPERS. What screams SAD LIFE SAD BLOKE more than a boring pair of socks or slippers.
4) Car Wash Kit. Could you be any more unoriginal? How deep is your love for dad if all you can think to get him is a sponge , soap and car wax. Why don't you buy him some marigolds and fairy liquid while you are at, then he can wash the cars and the dishes.
5) Don't be a tool and buy him tools; He has enough already that he doesn't use cluttering up the garage. He is quite capable of spending hours at Bunnings buying his own tools, the ones that he actually wants not some cheap ass version you are thinking of buying. If you must, buy him a Bunnings voucher.
6) Cologne. Smell is a very personal thing, buying something you think smells sexy on your dad is a bit weird, don't do it, unless it is this fragrance..
7) Anything to do with golf. If he does enjoy golf, chances are he may be quite good at it, if that is the case, he doesn't need some amateur buying him more crappy golf balls or some other shit equipment. You can of course buy him a Limited Edition Titleist Scotty Cameron:
8) A plant. Just what he needs - something else to fucking look after, he already has you, your siblings and your menopausal mother!
Now let's get on to what he really wants this fathers day:
He wants a Blow Job ( not from you) (probably not even from your mum!) He wants a nice big juicy steak, some beers, a bottle of expensive whiskey and some time to be left the fuck alone.. !!
He also wants to have some fun again... so buy him a him a gift that will make him laugh.. check out our collection below:
A sign for his Man Cave:
Socks that are actually useful:
A mug warmer:
A mug for the office:
A mug for home
A fun game:
A stylish pen:
A BBQ Branding Iron:
Some fun and very tasty hot sauce to go with the steak.
A BBQ Apron:
Some crappy jokes toilet paper (to read while he is having a long dump)
A stubby holder to keep his beer cold..
and last but not least a couple of fun notebooks that he may need:
This blog is a bit of fun, we know dad will be happy with whatever gift we get him. All dad really wants is to know that you love him and that you are thankful for everything he does for you.
To all the wonderful dads out there - thank you for being you. We hope you have a wonderful fathers day. We also want to share a loving thought to all those wonderful dads who have passed away and leave a big hole in our hearts, gone but never forgotten.
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