Level Up Your Birthday: A Hilariously Stress-Free Guide to Celebrating You!

Welcome to the birthday extravaganza, where aging gracefully is just a euphemism for surviving another trip around the sun. It's time to ditch the stress and embrace the art of birthday bliss. After all, who said growing older couldn't be accompanied by laughter and a touch of cheekiness? Join us on this epic journey to make your birthday the highlight of the year, or at least the highlight of your Google Calendar.

The Snooze Button Challenge:
Start your special day with a game-changing move: hitting the snooze button on reality. Who says you have to adult on your birthday? Enjoy a few extra moments of blissful sleep and dream about a world where calories don't count, and responsibilities vanish into thin air.

Cake for Breakfast in bed:
Breakfast of champions? Try breakfast of birthday legends! Swap the cornflakes for a slice of cake. It's the one day a year when sprinkles on your morning pastry aren't just acceptable but encouraged. After all, who needs scrambled eggs when you can have a sugar high to kick-start your day? Just make sure you organise someone to deliver it to you on a tray with a hot cup of coffee in your favourite mug. 

The Mandatory 'No Adulting' Rule:
Declare your birthday as a no-adulting zone. Avoid responsibilities, obligations, and any attempts at rational decision-making. If someone asks you to adult, respond with a dramatic gasp and inform them that it's against your birthday religion. This will of course mean you should absolutely take the day off work!

Gift Yourself the Absurd:
Don’t rely on others to get you the right gift, cake, or surprise… organise it yourself and get them to pay for it! (that way you will not be disappointed). Treat yourself to a gift that's completely unnecessary and utterly absurd. Whether it's a neon-coloured unicorn onesie or a plant that thrives solely on neglect, make sure it brings you joy and a healthy dose of laughter. Because on your birthday, practicality takes a back seat to whimsy.

The 'I'm Busy Accepting Compliments' Activity:
Plan an activity that involves soaking up compliments like a birthday sponge. Whether it's a spa day, a hike, or simply a stroll through the supermarket aisles, make it clear that on this day, praise is not just welcomed but expected. After all, you're officially another year more awesome – bask in the glory!

F the Phone! 
"Sorry, I can't answer your call right now – I'm in the middle of an important meeting with my birthday cake". That's right, we permit you not to take calls from anyone likely to annoy you (that may mean leaving your phone off🤣)

There's always Paris:
If you can’t think about what gift ideas you want – Champagne and Paris are always a good idea, after all, age is just a number, but croissants are forever.

Show Gratitude on your Special Day:
Don’t worry about the passage of time… you are extremely lucky to still be here after all your shenanigans.

Swap streamers for boarding passes:
Don’t spend money you don’t have organising a party which you won’t enjoy for people who won’t appreciate it. Save that money and go on a trip with your besties.

Don’t measure your worth by Facebook messages:
In the grand circus of life, Facebook messages are like cotton candy – sweet, fleeting, and not a reliable measure of your true worth. Sure, your aunt's animated GIF of a dancing cat might brighten your day, but let's not confuse the social media confetti with a ticker tape parade in your honour.

The final pieces of Wisdom to make your Birthday Bliss:
Sleep, eat, drink, open gifts – relax and repeat. And most importantly do this with people who make you laugh.

In the grand scheme of life, birthdays are the annual opportunity to hit the pause button, laugh at the absurdity of it all, and celebrate the fact that you're still here, kicking and thriving. So, go ahead, embrace the ridiculousness, eat that extra slice of cake, finish off that bottle of champagne, and remember that growing older may be mandatory, but growing up is entirely optional. Happy birthday, you fabulous human! May your day be as stress-free and whimsically wonderful as you are!