January 15, 2020 2 min read

I love Facebook memories.. this came up in my feed from last year.

Ok ...this was my evening.... Tonight on the way home my 10 year old daughter was talking about funny cat videos on you tube.. especially the ones with cucumbers 🥒 apparently cats go psycho if you put a cucumber by them.
Maya was explaining it was a natural cat instinct being scared as they think it is a snake .. ANYWAY I said ”Why don’t we try it when we get home with our cats (Eddie and Milo who are 14)  Hubby says... “but we don’t have any cucumbers 🥒 “  
No problem I replied, "let’s stop in at the shop on way home and I’ll get one"  Well as you can imagine a few jokes pass between me and hubby about going into the shop for just one cucumber for my pussy...  
As we parked the kids said can you get a treat for us while you are in there.  
I forgot to ask Maya whether it was best with a Lebanese cucumber or long continental one so I bought both...  being the nice mum I am I also bought some caramel popcorn for the kids. 
As proudly inappropriate as I am I couldn’t bring myself to go the the lady on the checkout with two cucumbers and two bags of popcorn at 8 pm on a Saturday night!
I check out using self serve and didn’t bother with a bag. ( should have done! ).  
I run out of Coles and to the car I fell arse over tit on a mini speed bump... land with a bang and my cucumbers and popcorn go flying!! 
To my horror A CROWD GATHERS... “OMG are you ok?” An old lady picks up my shopping for me .. TWO CUCUMBERS AND TWO BAGS OF POPCORN!  
Another lady says .. "ohh you’re going to be sore in the morning" (I hope she was referring to my knee and not that fact I had bought two cucumbers.. ) 
Another bloke says ... “Blimy you went flying as did your cucumbers”.
I tried to save my embarrassment by explaining I was buying the cucumbers for a test with my cats ... but that just made me sound like a crazy cat woman in need of cock! 
Meanwhile Ben is in the car with the kids laughing hysterically.   That’s the last time I friggen go in to Coles to buy cucumbers by myself!!  
And the moral of the story??? The cats didn’t give a fuck .... not a single fuck! 

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