Rude Christmas Food & Inappropriate Nibbles.

Having a fun themed menu is the classic cornerstone of any party.  Have fun creating a Christmas menu with these inappropriate menu ideas...

Let's start with dessert first...  you'll need a Christmas themed cake, 

(image source Kennedy News & Media) 

Or maybe if the above is a bit much for you.. you could have this cute snowman instead. 

(photo from lebakerysensual.com/)

Maybe bake yourself a penis cake or biscuits? 

(if you would like to see some other dick like cakes - check out our very imformative BLOG - OUR TOP 10 FAVOURITE PENIS CAKES 

Now let's get to the main course..

Most people call these pigs in blanket... but we like to call them willies in foreskin. 

 Apparently this next dish is very tasty.... it is stuffed chicken fillet with white sauce...  (looks like something else to us - we will leave it to your imagination) 

You may want to serve it with fries instead of roast potatoes.. (check out crimpy style fries) 

If you are having the traditional turkey don't forget to let it chill in the sink for a few hours...

You may want to serve it with vegetables such as carrots, eggplant (aubergine) and capsicum (Peppers)

Don't forget to smother these nice vegetables in a lovely gravy, make sure you use a nice gravy boat to pour it from.

You don't need to have meat on the Christmas lunch table, for the vegetarians, you can have a nice bowl of penis pasta...substitute the mince with a plant based protein. 

Or if you are on a diet or needing to prep for a colonoscopy, you could always just substitute the main meal and go with a clear broth soup such as

Now let's end with the starters or as we like to say the "naughty nibbles"

You'll need a rude charcuterie board

Don't forget the baby cheeses... 

or maybe you should make baby Jesus...

And it wouldn't be Xmas without seafood..... apparently these penis fish are a delicacy in Korea..

here is a pic we found of a beaver eating a penis.... fish.... (you don't see that every day!) 

We are not sure about the penis fish we will stick to our normal crab, prawns, lobster & crayfish.   If you are on a budget though you may want to recreate this dish.. 

We hope you liked our rude food edition... enjoy Christmas in July! 

 If you need some fun gifts for your Christmas in July party - check out our hilarious range here.